Stop Coping and Start Thriving (sorry for the corny title)

February 12, 2014
Thumbnail image for Stop Coping and Start Thriving (sorry for the corny title)

I’ve been thinking about the idea of coping strategies lately. Sometimes in my work with substance abusers, or anyone struggling to deal with their lives, we discuss other ways of coping. Some substance abuse work is often centered around a relapse prevention plan and new, healthy coping strategies. Everyone tries to get the person to […]

Read the full article →

Finding Substance

January 9, 2014
Thumbnail image for Finding Substance

The word substance has my attention lately. There is something both conceptually satisfying about it as well as experientially satisfying. Substantial, filled up, plenty, enough, solid, definitive, complete. How often are we human beings feeling this way or making decisions in our lives that are intended to bring about these kinds of descriptions? A lot […]

Read the full article →

New Adventures are Never Final

November 26, 2013
Thumbnail image for New Adventures are Never Final

After being lost for periods of time, we sometimes find our way. Or maybe I should say we find “a” way. A path, a route, that at least begins to lead somewhere other than the stuck place in which we find ourselves. It might not be the end of the story or the journey, but […]

Read the full article →

The Annoying thing About Change

November 21, 2013
Thumbnail image for The Annoying thing About Change

I’ve written elsewhere that you have to change to change. Pretty simple, right? But yet we all struggle with this. Even the smallest and most mundane things we would like to change can feel difficult. The thing about change is this: we don’t want to. We all like to think that we are willing to […]

Read the full article →

Living Honestly

October 31, 2013
Thumbnail image for Living Honestly

Why do we live in a world where honesty is a scarce value? What does honesty mean to people? What are we even talking about when we discuss honesty? The way I am using the word has more to do with authenticity and congruency. I am not talking about truth telling and lying when someone […]

Read the full article →

Lost

October 24, 2013
Thumbnail image for Lost

You are standing on a street corner and wondering how you got there. Nothing looks familiar and anxious energy starts to rise. You aren’t even sure when you got lost but you are quite aware at this moment that you are indeed lost. People start to look different. Directions all look the same. All previous […]

Read the full article →

Welcome to Your Life: how life changes us

October 17, 2013
Thumbnail image for Welcome to Your Life: how life changes us

I’ve been learning a lot in the past several years. I have delved more deeply than ever into the areas of philosophy, psychology and religion in ways that have been more than stimulating. Much of my exploration has been to try and make sense of my own struggles and those of my clients, but it […]

Read the full article →

Seasons of Our Lives

October 3, 2013
Thumbnail image for Seasons of Our Lives

We are now into the autumn season. It’s cooler, it gets dark earlier and things are beginning to die. The fall is a transition period. Nature’s process of death and hibernation is not yet fully finished. The fall is a movement toward winter, a time of chill and bleak looking nature for many parts of […]

Read the full article →

Why is Parenting So Hard These Days?

September 19, 2013
Thumbnail image for Why is Parenting So Hard These Days?

Narrowing Worlds and Great Expectations: on why parenting is so hard these days Where to begin.  I have so many thoughts on parenting that I should be writing several articles but I don’t feel like doing that.  I want to say as much as I can here because really, it’s all connected. I first set […]

Read the full article →

The Blank Page (of life)

September 5, 2013
Thumbnail image for The Blank Page (of life)

As I sit here and stare at the blank page, anxiety builds. There many things to say, too much really, and carving that down into an essay feels hard sometimes. But is that the real reason? Fear is also involved in the confrontation with the blank page or canvas. To start interacting with the blank […]

Read the full article →

On Why You Want to Stay Stuck

August 29, 2013
Thumbnail image for On Why You Want to Stay Stuck

Why are you not getting better? Why does it seem like nothing changes for you? Why do you continue to have the same ailments haunting you? Why are you coninuously stuck in the same types of predicaments in your life? Why do you find yourself in the same kind of relationships that end up falling […]

Read the full article →

When Counselling is Part of the Problem

August 21, 2013
Thumbnail image for When Counselling is Part of the Problem

Sometimes I believe that people come to me for the wrong reasons.  Not that there is even anything wrong with that, because who am I to really know what are the “right” reasons?  But my sense is that sometimes the desire for counselling is more of the same in a person’s ongoing dynamic. For some […]

Read the full article →

Can You Accept the World as it Is?

August 1, 2013
Thumbnail image for Can You Accept the World as it Is?

Can we accept that some people won’t get better? Can we accept that issues like addiction and homelessness aren’t going away? Can we accept that our government won’t change? Can we accept the bottomless pit of consumerism? Can I accept that my client isn’t getting better? Can we truly accept the suffering of another or […]

Read the full article →

The Power of Walking

July 25, 2013
Thumbnail image for The Power of Walking

I like simple things that have a lot of meaning.  I also like utilizing experiences that do not require a whole lot of preparation, planning, and money.  Over the past year I have been walking a lot.  I walk back and forth to work most days and take walks at other times, either with my […]

Read the full article →

The Legacy of Aging | James Hillman

July 18, 2013
Thumbnail image for The Legacy of Aging | James Hillman

In the following video, archetypal psychologist James Hillman takes on the important but neglected topic of aging.  We have lost a sense of appreciating what older generations can offer our community and our society.  We have lost a sense of our elders and learning from their experience. In my previous article I talked a bit […]

Read the full article →

Why Are You Dying?

July 10, 2013
Thumbnail image for Why Are You Dying?

There is something exciting and rewarding when embracing the fear that comes with “falling forward” (see my article Getting Into Your Life to learn more about “falling forward.”) Lately, as I have tried to embrace the fears in my life, I have found that my relationship to fear in general is changing. Something about it […]

Read the full article →

The Shades of Our Experience

July 4, 2013
Thumbnail image for The Shades of Our Experience

Curiosity is a word that has been on my mind for months. I try and let it guide both my life and my work with clients. I try and encourage clients to be curious about their lives. I also try and encourage clients to be curious about their assumptions about themselves or their explanations for […]

Read the full article →

Why Are You Angry?

June 20, 2013
Thumbnail image for Why Are You Angry?

We have over vilified anger in our society. Religions see it as a major problem. Psychology treats it like a toddler to be managed. People are fearful of it. But anger need not be any of these things. Anger can be a change producing and helpful gift from our deeper selves. In my experience of […]

Read the full article →

Accepting That Which We Fear

June 6, 2013
Thumbnail image for Accepting That Which We Fear

I want to write about the experience of embracing fear, or the very experience which one fears happening. Whether it is the actual experience or being very near to that experience does not matter as much. I believe the same, if not similar, feelings arise. I want to write about this because I am having […]

Read the full article →

Get Lost | finding yourself through the twists and turns of uncertainty

May 22, 2013
Thumbnail image for Get Lost | finding yourself through the twists and turns of uncertainty

When I was younger, attending university, I used to take drives through the back roads of central Pennsylvania as a way to be by myself.  I enjoyed these drives thoroughly and they became a large part of my existence.  It was a time for me to think, enjoy driving, and experience the landscape. On quite […]

Read the full article →